Want to Give A Little Advice? Don’t Do It! (or not until you have read this first)

Giving advice to someone who may be struggling, or stuck in that maelstrom of an unresolved situation, comes naturally, and often unconsciously for many of us. Before you know it, out pops your opinion and well-intentioned, ‘just do_____’. Sometimes we even follow up with our analysis of why our advice … Continue reading

How to talk to kids about sexual abuse, and how you can help prevent it

One of my clients came into my office one day for a last-minute appointment and he sounded anxious. I had been working with him as his psychotherapist for several months and we had just started to delve into some deeper issues as our therapeutic bond became stronger. It was in that session, … Continue reading

Getting Triggered! It can be a slippery slope but doesn’t have to be

We all know that feeling of getting triggered. A quick feeling of anger, hurt, fear, or perhaps the feeling of being misjudged or ignored. That comment from a boss or colleague that leaves you feeling criticized. An eye roll from your teen. The dreaded silence of a partner when you … Continue reading

Making Peace With Your Inner Pessimist

The explosion in neuroscience over the past 20 years has revealed, among many things, that the human brain has a built-in bias toward the negative. In the world of evolutionary psychology this makes a great deal of sense. If we don’t stay alive, other biological imperatives like “Where’s the food?” … Continue reading

The Growing Problem of Social Isolation and What to Do About It

A client sat across from me in my office sobbing. “I feel so lonely” she finally said after she collected herself. This particular woman has a lot of friends and a successful career- how could someone as bright and friendly as her feel lonely? This woman is not alone – … Continue reading

The Imago Center’s Lena Derhally on how to say “No” and setting boundaries

Lena Derhally was interviewed by Margarita Tartakovsky at Psych Central on tips to make saying No a lot easier.  She gives us three tips to  set boundaries, “If we learn to say ‘no,’ put our foot down and not let people take advantage of us, then we feel less resentful — … Continue reading

Feel your feelings

As a therapist who makes her livelihood by encouraging people to explore their feelings, I’m often amazed at the variety of ways we’re taught to avoid them, often from a very young age. Growing up in my family, my mother sometimes offered me cookies when I was feeling upset. To … Continue reading

  • Food for Thought

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