Tender Touch

Tender touching is one way that we demonstrate affection towards another person. When you tenderly smooth back your partner’s hair, squeeze his shoulder as you join him on the sofa, massage her feet at the end of a workday, and hold hands walking down the street you are offering security, … Continue reading

Stop Phubbing Your Partner! Are Cell Phones Getting in the Way of Your Relationship?

Not so very long ago I remember observing couples at restaurants spending more time looking at their cell phones than engaging each other and thinking how awful that was! Of course, not too long after that to my horror I realized that I was doing the same thing! Humbling! Recently, … Continue reading

Is Your Relationship “Woke”?

I met with a couple recently who spent the greater part of their session dialoguing about a topic they considered trivial. “Wow, I can’t believe we spent all that time talking about that…” she expressed. However, the structure of the Imago Relationship Dialogue they utilized had revealed several underlying emotions … Continue reading

The Science Behind Infidelity – Helen Fisher’s 10 Facts About Infidelity

If you aren’t familiar with Helen Fisher’s work and you are in a committed relationship, you should be! Committed relationships are hard work and various forms of infidelity are occasionally reported in my practice with both individuals and couples. As a guest author, Helen Fisher, the biological anthropologist who studies … Continue reading

Why I Need Help to be a Good Spouse and Parent

I was a child of the 1960’s – 70’s: The first generation of women in America discovering that they could, and perhaps should, have a career of their own outside the home. As little girls, my friends and I dreamed of our careers, not of having babies and making our … Continue reading

The NPR Diane Rehm Show: How We Choose Our Spouses

Recently, I listened to a panel discussion on the NPR Diane Rehm show entitled “How We Choose our Spouses”, (http://thedianerehmshow.org/shows/2016-10-17/how-we-choose-our-spouses). Did anyone else listen to this? The topic was inspired by a provocative New York Times article “Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person” by Alain de Botton. As a … Continue reading

The Best Wedding Gift Ever

If you are preparing to be married, consider premarital counseling: it’s the best investment in your relationship you’ll ever make. You don’t have to be religious to try it. Even though some couples come to premarital counseling because their priest, minister, or rabbi has made it a requirement before marriage, many … Continue reading

Is There a Future in Monogamy?

The classic model of marriage and partnership is changing. One reason is because internal and external pressures on marriage cause increasingly undeliverable expectations. Where once we were socially connected to communities and extended families over a lifetime, couples now expect their primary relationship to deliver all that comfort and connection. … Continue reading

2 Upcoming Workshops for Relationships in January

Start Right Stay Connected:  1 Day Premarital Workshop  January 24 Whether you are preparing to be married, newly married or committing to a long-term relationship, you’ll want to Start Right and Stay Connected. Here is an opportunity for you to get the knowledge and tools needed to navigate the challenges … Continue reading

Start Right, Stay Connected – An Imago Premarital Workshop

Our one day premarital and pre-commitment workshop Start Right, Stay Connected is an excellent way for couples considering a long-term commitment to invest in the health of their partnership. Led by Caroline and Jason Bernhardt-Lanier, the Start Right, Stay Connected workshop is designed for both heterosexual and same-sex couples. Participants … Continue reading

  • Food for Thought

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